Testimony of the Fallen

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Testimony of the Fallen

 

                You were just one of those people I see around. I never knew that a stranger like you would make me fall head over heels. I never expected that I would fall in love with you. It all starts with a simple friendship. Who expected us to be friends right? It was a simple friendship that turned into a friendship for keeps. It was a friendship full of happiness, dreams and hopes. I wish it stayed that way so I didn’t have to lose you. But my playful heart chose to fall for you.

 

                That phone call, that night, August 30th will never be forgotten. That marked the end of the two years we cherished together. There was never an us, there will never be one. All the words I uttered in that phone call will always keep playing back in my mind and those tears I shed would always come back to me. Our two years together were forgotten in a few minutes of conversation. You told me everything was going to be alright but then the tables turned.

 

                You know I tried everything to get you back, to get what we had back. I chased you till I was told to just stop. I stopped not because I hated you but because I loved you too much that I needed to let you go, I needed to let what we had go. It wasn’t easy and will never be but I couldn’t bear holding on to someone who’s slowly letting go.

 

All our memories together come back to me every night. My 2 am thoughts consisted of you and all that we had. Thoughts of what ifs and could have beens. The last 11 months were full of regrets and hatred. And I would always wish that I had the power to undo those last 11 months that I didn’t spend with you. If only knew I was leaving and that this year will be my last with you I wouldn’t have wasted the time I had with you. But it was my chance to tell you I loved you and I believe that you only regret the chances you didn’t take.

 

People say you were a fool for letting me go but I think I’m the bigger fool for making myself believe you’ll chase after me. I was the bigger fool for making myself believe I’ll never lose you. I was the bigger fool for making my world revolve around you. I was the bigger fool because I made myself believe that you loved me too.

 

                You changed me, made me into the person I am right now. I don’t know if I should thank you for breaking my heart. But I believe I should. You broke my heart into a million pieces and it wasn’t so easy to put it back again. But then putting my heart back together made me realize that some things break apart to fall back together again in the end. I never imagined my world without you, but sometimes a girl just needs to learn alone.

 

But the most important thing I learned is that whenever you fall, no one is assured to catch you and that falling to the cold, hard ground will teach you to get back up with your own two feet.

 

 

                And if you ask me if I have moved on the answer is …

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Yes, I have moved on and I know you also did too, but in my heart I will always remember the times when there was me and you.

 

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